Your job in any relationship is to not “get” them to do anything.. You need to practice providing as much support and freedom as you possibly can so that they can be exactly who they are Just make sure you don’t sacrifice your own needs to do so Love doesn’t try to control or coerce An avoidant partner isn’t going to open up by exerting pressure An anxious partner isn’t going to stop feeling because you try to rationalize them as irrational Your job is to love your partner where they are at, for